FUNERAL SERVICE

APPRECIATION FOR COMING

On behalf of the family I want to express our appreciation that you came to share our time of grief with us, and that you came to comfort the family as well.

K'REE-YAH RENDING OUR GARMENTS (OPTIONAL)

Rending one's garments is an ancient mourning practice. It used to be customary to tear one's clothes upon hearing sad news, especially upon hearing about the death of a dear one (2 Sam. 1:11, Gen. 37:24). We invite you to participate in this ancient custom with us now if you wish to do so. The family will not be offended if you don't.

Baruch Ata Adonai, Elohaynu Melech HaOlam, Dayan Ha-Emet. Blessed are You O Lord our God, King of the Universe, the True Judge.

TZIDDUK HADEEN

Tzidduk HaDeen means justifying the Judge. This prayer is designed to let human beings know that God is perfectly just. Even when we experience the death of a loved one, we are never to blame God for anything. We are to have the attitude expressed by Job: though He slay me, yet I will trust Him.

God is sovereign and can do what He wills because to Him belongs infinite power. He is greater than all things. The Lord your God is the God of gods and the Lord of lords, the great, the mighty, and the awesome God (Deut. 10:17). Power and might are in Your hand so that no one can stand against You (2 Chron. 20:6).

God is sovereign and can do what He wills because He is absolutely free. He can do whatever He wants to do anywhere, at any time, to carry out His eternal purpose without any interference from anyone or anything. No one and nothing can hinder Him or compel Him or stop Him. He is able to do as He pleases always, everywhere, forever. Our God is in the heavens; He does whatever He pleases (Psalm 115:3). I know that the Lord is great, and that our Lord is above all gods. Whatever the Lord pleases, He does, in heaven and in the earth, in the seas and in all deeps (Psalm 135:5-6).

Can you imagine the Lord of Hosts having to request permission from anyone or applying to a higher authority for anything? Where is the greater one to whom He can appeal? To whom would God go to for permission? Who is higher than the Most High? Who is mightier than the Almighty? Whose position comes before that of the Eternal One? At whose throne would God kneel?

He is the King of the universe. He is superior to all others. He is the supreme being. He is supreme in power, rank and authority. As the King He has the right to rule over His universe as He sees fit. The sovereignty of God extends over all His creatures from the highest archangel to the lowest one celled protozoa. All the inhabitants of the earth are accounted as nothing, but He does according to His will in the host of heaven and among the inhabitants of earth; and no one can ward off His hand or say to Him, What have you done (Dan. 4:35)?

God is sovereign because He is the Creator and therefore the Owner of all things. To the Lord your God belong heaven and the highest heavens, the earth and all that is in it Moses declared (Deut. 10:14). Nehemiah prayed: You alone are the Lord. You have made the heavens, the heaven of heavens with all their host, the earth and all that is on it, the seas and all that is in them. You give life to all of them and the heavenly host bows down before You (Neh. 9:6). Heaven and earth and all that they contain belong to Him. As the Creator and Owner, He has the right to make use of His creation as He wills.

God is sovereign and can do what He wills because He is the Preserver of all thing. He upholds all things with His power. In Him we live and move and have our being. If it weren't for His continual upholding of the universe and everything in it, we would instantaneously disintegrate. Therefore it is just that all things serve Him, since all things depend on Him every moment for their existence.

God is sovereign and can do what He wills because He is the Redeemer. Not only did God create the Jewish people, but He went an additional step and He redeemed us out of Egypt, out of the house of slavery. God redeemed us - He bought us. We have been bought with a price. That gives God rights over us.

God is sovereign and can do what He wills over every area of man's existence. He determines the times, the places, and all the circumstances of every human being's life. He determines when, where and under what circumstances each individual will be born, live, and die. He is actively involved in our existence even before we are born. He has determined the numbers of our days before we have even one. God holds our souls in His hands. When he takes our breath away, we die.

The Tzidduk Hadeen prayer answers the question: If God is such a great King, could He not have prevented sin and evil, pain and suffering and the death of our loved one? While we can seldom determine why God decreed one thing rather than another, there are several things that we do know. We do know that God cannot decree anything that is contrary to His nature, to His wisdom, His love, to His righteousness or to His holiness.

He cannot go against His nature. He cannot deny Himself and His essential nature. He cannot be cruel. He cannot lie, sin, or change. Even though His sovereignty is universal and absolute, it is a kingship of wisdom, holiness and love. As a wise God, He may be expected to act rationally. As a good God, He may be expected to have the best interests of His creatures at heart. As the all powerful God, He may be relied on as having the ability to accomplish all His purposes.

Don't allow yourself to get embittered by tragedy. Don't deny God because of the death of a loved one, or be like those who deny God because of the death of many loved ones, like what happened in the Holocaust. The Word of God warns us: Is the axe to boast itself over the one who chops with it? Is the saw to exalt itself over the one who wields it? Shall the potter be considered as equal with the clay, that what is made should say to its maker, He did not make me; or what is formed say to him who formed it, He has no understanding? Woe to the one who quarrels with his Maker. Will the clay say to the Potter, What are You doing? (Is.10:15, 29:16, 45:9)?

The Lord, He is God. What He does is right, for all His ways are just. He is a God of faithfulness, and without injustice, righteous and upright is He. He is God, perfect in every deed. Who can say to Him: what are You doing? He rules below and above; He causes death and life; He brings down to the grave and raises up. He is God, perfect in every deed. You decree and You perform it. Please show us unmerited kindness. O You who are righteous in all your ways, You who are slow to anger and full of mercy, have compassion on the children, and grandchildren and the great grandchildren. Lord, You are righteous in causing death and causing life. Blessed be the true Judge, who causes death and life.

Blessed be He, for His judgement is true; He sees all, and He punishes and rewards every man. All must give account to Him. We know, O Lord, that Your judgement is just; You are right when you speak, and just when You give sentence. One must not find fault with your manner of judging. You are righteous O Lord, and Your judgement is right. Dayan Emet, the true and righteous Judge, blessed are You whose judgements are all righteous and true. The life of every being is in Your hand; Your right hand is full of righteousness.

Have mercy on the remnant of Your own flock, and say to the angel: stay your hand. You are great in counsel and mighty in action; Your eyes are open to all the ways of men, to give to every one according to his conduct and according to the results of his deeds. We proclaim that the Lord is just. He is my stronghold, and there is no wrong in Him. He, being merciful, forgives iniquity and does not destroy; frequently He turns His anger away, and does not stir up all His anger. The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord.

Adonai natan vah-Adonai lah-kach; y’hee shaym Adonai m’voh-rach. The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord.

ETERNAL LIFE

Unfortunately concepts like the resurrection, heaven, hell, and eternal life have become foreign to most people today. Eternal life is much more than the memory of the dead by the living.

God wanted us to be very sure about the possibility of having eternal life. Man will easily fall into despair if he doesn't believe that he can live forever. We will often make the wrong moral choices in life, and no lead our lives the way we should if we don't believe that eternal life is a reality. We have an innate desire to live forever. This is expressed in Ecclesiastes 3:11: He has set eternity in their hearts.

The idea of eternal life is found in concepts as:

Heaven: which is mentioned repeatedly in Torah as a real place, the eternal dwelling place of God and the heavenly hosts (2 Chron. 30:27).

The Tree of Life and The Book of Life: (Genesis 3:22, Exodus 32:3).

The new heavens and a new earth (Isaiah 65:17). The Lord God declares: Behold, I create a new heavens and a new earth; and the former things shall not be remembered (all the sadness and pain) or come to mind. But be glad a rejoice forever in what I create.

The concept of the Day of Judgement: man needs to be raised back to life in order to be judged for how he conducted his life on earth. In this world the wicked often prosper. The righteous and innocent often suffer. Life would be a cruel mockery if there were no final judgement where God righted all wrongs, judged the wicked and rewarded the faithful. In order for judgement there has to be resurrection.

Eternal life is explicitly stated in:

the book of the prophet Daniel: Many of those who sleep in the dust of the ground shall awake, these to everlasting life (Daniel 12:2).

by Job: I know that my Redeemer lives, and at the last He will take his stand on the earth. Even after my skin is destroyed, yet from my flesh I shall see God (Job 19:25-26).

by Isaiah: Your dead will live; their corpses will rise. You who lie in the dust, awake and shout for joy (Isaiah 26:19).

by King David: In Your presence is fullness of joy, at Your right hand there are pleasures naytzach, forever.

by Moses: Lest he stretch out his hand, take from the tree of life and eat and live l'olam forever...

EULOGY

We also want to remember our loved one and leave with fond memories.

EL MALEH RACHAMIM GOD FULL OF COMPASSION

God, full of compassion, El maleh rachamin, You are the righteous judge of the living and the dead. We would pray that the soul of our loved one who we remember today might be kept in Your presence among those who are holy and pure, whose light shines in the firmament. Father of mercy, bring him under the shelter of Your wings and let his soul be bound up in the bond of eternal life. Be his possession and may his rest be forever peaceful. Grant perfect rest to the soul of Mabel, who has passed to his eternal dwelling place. O Heavenly Father, may our memory of them be without bitterness. May You bring us comfort in our remembrance of them, and may our remembrance inspire us to serve You better. The Lord being his heritage, may he rest in peace.

Eternal God, remember the soul of Mabel, who has gone into eternity. May her soul be bound up in the bond of eternal life, together with the souls of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob; and all other righteous men and women who are in Paradise. Baruch Ata Adonai, Elohaynu Melech HaOlam, Dayan Ha-Emet. Blessed are You O Lord our God, King of the Universe, the True Judge. And let us say, Amen.

TZIDDUK HADEEN

Your righteousness is an everlasting righteousness, and Your Bible (Torah) is truth. Your righteousness, O God, is most high; You who have done great things, O God, who is like You? Your righteousness is like the mighty mountains; Your judgements are like the vast sea; You save man and beast O Lord.

Lord, what is man that you notice him? What is mortal man, that you consider him? Man is like a breath; his days are like a passing shadow. He flourishes and growing in the morning; he fades and withers in the evening. Therefore teach us how to number our days, that we may attain a heart of wisdom.

There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under heaven A time to give birth and a time to die; A time to plant and a time to uproot what is planted. A time to kill and a time to heal; A time to tear down and a time to build up. A time to weep and a time to laugh; A time to mourn and a time to dance. A time to throw stones and a time to gather stones; A time to embrace and a time to shun embracing. A time to search and a time to give up as lost; A time to keep and a time to throw away. A time to tear apart and a time to sew together; A time to be silent and a time to speak. A time to love and a time to hate; A time for war and a time for peace (Ecclesiastes 3:1-8).

EL MALEH RACHAMIM - GOD FULL OF COMPASSION

God, full of compassion, El maleh rachamin, You are the righteous judge of the living and the dead. We would hope that the souls of our loved one who we remember today might be kept in Your presence among those who are holy and pure, whose light shines in the firmament. Father of mercy, bring him under the shelter of Your wings and let his soul be bound up in the bond of eternal life. Be his possession and may his rest be forever peaceful. Grant perfect rest to the soul of ---- who has passed to his eternal dwelling place. O Heavenly Father, may our memory of them be without bitterness. May You bring us comfort in our remembrance of them, and may our remembrance inspire us to serve You better. The Lord being his heritage, may he rest in peace. And let us say, Amen.

MOURNER'S KADDISH

Glorified and sanctified be God's great name throughout the world which He has created according to His will. May He establish His Kingdom in your lifetime and during your days, and within the life of the entire house of Israel, speedily and soon; and say amayn. May His great name be blessed forever and to all eternity. Blessed and praised, glorified and exalted, extolled and honored, adored and lauded be the name of the Holy One, blessed be He, beyond all the blessings and hymns, praises and consolations that are ever spoken in the world; and say, amayn. May there be abundant peace from Heaven, and life, for us and for all Israel; and say, amayn. He who creates peace in His heavenly heights, may He create peace for us and for all Israel; and say, amayn.

Yit-ga-dal v'yit-ka-dash sh'may rah-bah b'al-mah dee vrah chi-ru-tay v'yam-leech mal-chu-tay b'chai-yay-chon uv-yo-may-chon uv-chai-yay d'chol bait Yisrael ba'ah-gah-lah u'viz-man ka-reev v'eem-ru amayn.

Y'hay sh'may ra-bah m'va-rach ah-lam u'l'al-may al-mai-yah. Yit-ba-rach v'yish-ta-bach v'yit-pa-ar v'yit-ro-mam v'yit-nah-say v'yit-hadar v'yit-ah-leh v'yit-ha-lal sh'may d'kud-shah b'reech Hu, l'ay-lah min kol bir-cha-tah v'shee-ra-tah tush-b'cha-tah v'neh-cheh-mah-tah da'ah-mee-ran b'al-mah v'eem-ru amayn.

Y'hay shla-mah rabah min sh'mai-yah v'chai-yeem ah-laynu v'al kol Yisrael v'eem-ru ah-mayn. Oh-seh shalom bim-ro-mahv Hu ya-ah-seh shalom ah-laynu v'al kol Yisrael v'eem-ru amayn.

The Lord, He is God. What You do is right, for all Your ways are just. You are a God of faithfulness, and without injustice, righteous and upright are You. You are God, perfect in every deed. You rule below and above. You decree and You perform it. You cause death and life; You bring down to the grave and You can raise up again. Who can say to You: what are You doing? You are righteous in causing death and causing life.

O You who are righteous in all Your ways, You who are slow to anger and full of mercy, have compassion on the rest of the family and friends. Blessed are You O Lord our God, King of the Universe, Dayan He-Emite, the True Judge. And let us say, Amayn.

The Lord has given, and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord (Job. 1:21). Adonai natan vah-Adonai lah-kach; y’hee shaym Adonai m’voh-rach. The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord.

SCRIPTURE PASSAGES

PSALM 23

The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul; He leads me in the paths of righteousness for His name's sake. Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil; for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; You anoint my head with oil, my cup overflows. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life; and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.

PSALM 16
PSALM 121
ISAIAH 55:6-9
ISAIAH 25:6-9
REVELATION 21:3-5
JOHN 11:20-27

MORE THOUGHTS ABOUT LIFE AND DEATH

Wise king Solomon, who tasted the best that life had to offer, who knew wealth almost beyond measure, power that few had experienced, and had all the prestige that being king of Israel could bring a man - drew some conclusions about the meaning of life. He wrote this: It is better to go to a house of mourning than to go to a house of feasting, because that is the end of every man, and the living takes it to heart (Ecc. 7:2).

Death is a reminder that we are mortal. Life in this fallen world is a fleeting moment, a wisp, a vapor, compared to the eternal scheme of things.

Moses, the man of God, said this: Mankind is like grass which sprouts anew in the morning. In the morning it flourishes, and sprouts anew; toward evening it fades, and withers away... So teach us to number our days, that we might present You a heart of wisdom (Psalm 90:5-6, 12).

Rabbi Paul took time to consider the end of his life, to the time when his heart would take its last beat and when he would stand before God. This is what he said: The time of my departure has come. I have fought the good fight, I have finished the course, I have kept the faith; in the future there is laid up for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day; and not only to me, but also to those who have loved His appearing.

Paul looked forward to his departure from this life. The word "departure" is used in the sense of a ship hoisting anchor and setting sail. Leaving the confinement of the dock for the blues seas and open water. It can be used in the sense of a soldier, loosening the ropes of a tent, preparing to move on. For a soldier it is a meaningful time when he breaks camp, knowing that he has fought well, and the battle is over, and he is going home. Earlier this week, after a life devoted to God, XXX broke camp and he went home. He fought the good fight. He finished the race. He kept the faith.

Wise king Solomon observed that the memory of the righteous is blessed (Proverbs 10:7). I believe that one day we will find out that the important people in this world were not the people whose names were household words. The important people will not be the famous preachers or presidents, actors or baseball, basketball or football stars,. or T.V. personalities. It will be the simple righteous people who served God humbly and faithfully, who finished the course. And in their own quiet way, they touched a lot of lives. People like XXX remind me of the eternal significance of a live lived, not spectacularly, but steadily, for Messiah.

And so we come today with good memories of a righteous man, who fought the good fight, who finished the course, who kept the faith, and who has now departed and gone home.

But even knowing that he is with God, even knowing that he is in a far better place, there is still the sorrow of parting. It is right and good to grieve at this time. But we don’t have to grieve like those who have no hope. The night before He was to depart and go home, Messiah Yeshua said this words to comfort hurting people:

Let not your heart be troubled; believe in God, believe also in Me. In My Father's house there are many dwelling places; if it were not so, I would have told you; for I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go to prepare a place for you, I will come again, and receive you to Myself; that where I am, you may be also (John 14:1-3).

Yeshua reminds us that for XXX, and for all who believe in Him, this world is not our home. Home is a place that Messiah is preparing for us. This is the reason why Christians need not fear death or grieve in quite the same way as the rest of the world.

That is the difference between a true Christian and every one else. That the kind of man that XXX was. He received Christ into his life. Yeshua became His living. Savior. XXX has gone home. We are a people of hope. Yes, there is still sorrow, sadness and tears, but at the same time there is comfort and joy knowing that we belong to Messiah Jesus, and we look forward to the eternal life that He makes possible.

MORE THOUGHTS ON LIFE AND DEATH

I’d like to briefly help us consider the issues of life and death, so we can better number our days, and present to God a heart of wisdom.

A couple of weeks ago there was a funeral in the chapel where we meet, and there was an open coffin in the foyer. The family and friends of the dead man were there, and Martha observed that everyone was standing as far away from the casket as possible. Why did they do that?

Death is part of life, and yet, it seems unnatural. If the Lord doesn’t come for us as part of that last generation of believers who are alive when He comes, and are immediately transformed, then all of us will die. And yet, most of us are uncomfortable with death. Why is that?

In the beginning, the good and wise Creator made a new universe with a beautiful planet, that was specially designed for human beings. God created the first human beings, Adam and Eve, and placed them on Earth, in a magnificent garden in the Middle East, named Gan Eden (the Garden of Delights). They were designed in God’s own image, with mind, intelligence, emotion, will, and the ability to reason, so that they could know God, have a personal relationship with Him, and be His companions. There the Eternal One befriended our parents. But He also warned them that there was one thing that could ruin everything - eating from the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil. If they did so, they would surely die. Death would now be our end.

You know what happened. Adam and Eve were tempted, and they disobeyed God, ate from the forbidden Tree, and immediately everything changed. Their orientation to God, who is the Source of Life and Blessing, was altered. Instead of drawing nearer to God, they ran away from Him. Instead of moving toward life and blessing, they began to die. The world was cursed, and Adam and Eve were exiled from the Garden of Eden. This one act of disobedience allowed sin and evil and death to enter this beautiful new world and ruin everything.

And yet, the Lord was merciful to ruined mankind, and provided a way for chah-vay-root (fellowship) with God to be restored. This was accomplished through the korban - the sacrifice. God provided garments of skin for Adam and Eve, which means that at least one innocent animal had to die so that their nakedness, guilt and shame could be covered over. He made it possible for us to make a Y’tzee-ah, an Exodus from the state of death we were in, and come home to God, our Source, our Life, our Home.

Several thousands years later, the entire Jewish people made a Y’tzee-ah, an Exodus, from Egypt, from the house of bondage, from the land of slavery. We left that horrible state of slavery and death and headed home to the Land of Israel. That Y’tzee-ah also involved the death of an innocent sacrifice - the Passover Lamb.

Jump forward another 1500 years, to the First Century, that very special time when the Son of God left from the glories of His Heavenly Home, and came to this fallen, ruined, sinful planet.

One day He took along Peter and John and James, and went up on a mountain to pray. And while He was praying, the appearance of His face became different, and His clothing became white and gleaming. And suddenly two of Israel’s greatest heros were talking with Him; and they were Moses and Elijah, who, appearing in a glorious state, were speaking of Yeshua’s “Exodos”, His “departure” which He was about to accomplish at Jerusalem.

The Greek word “exodus” literally means “departure.” The use of the word Exodus here, along with Moses being present, brings to mind everything connected to Y’tzee-at Mitzraim, the Exodus of the Jewish people from Egypt.

Moses and Eliyahu and Yeshua knew that Yeshua was soon to die, but that His death was a Y’tzee-ah - an Exodus, a departure from this world of sin and death, and a coming home to God and life. For Messiah Yeshua, His Exodus was not a defeat, but a great victory, just as it was for the Jewish people.

Earlier this week, after a difficult but good life, XXX made his Exodus. He fought the good fight. He finished the race. He kept the Faith. He made his Y’tzee-ah, and he went home.

I believe that one day we will find out that the great and important people in this world were not the people whose names were household words. The great and important people will not turn out to be the famous preachers or presidents, actors or sports stars. It will be the simple righteous people who served God humbly and faithfully, who served the Messiah, who accomplished their God-appointed tasks, and then simply made their exodus and went home. People like XXX remind me of the eternal significance of a life lived, maybe not seen by millions, but a life lived steadily and faithfully for God. And in their own quiet way, they touched a lot of lives.

And so we leave today with good memories of a good man, who fought the good fight, who finished the course, who kept the faith, and who has now departed and gone home. But even knowing that XXX is in a far better place, there is still the sorrow of parting. It is right and good to grieve at this time. But we don’t have to grieve like those who have no hope. The night before He was to depart and go home, Messiah Yeshua said these words to comfort hurting, grieving people:

Let not your heart be troubled; believe in God, believe also in Me. In My Father's house there are many dwelling places; if it were not so, I would have told you; for I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go to prepare a place for you, I will come again, and receive you to Myself; that where I am, you may be also (John 14:1-3).

Yeshua reminds us that for XXX and for all who believe in Him, this world is not our home. Home is another place that the Messiah is preparing for us. This is the reason why Christians and Messianic Jews don't need to fear death or grieve in quite the same way as the rest of the world. Messiah is preparing a home for us, and is coming back for us, so we can live forever and ever with Him.

Yes, there is still sorrow, sadness and tears, but at the same time there is comfort and joy knowing that we belong to Messiah Yeshua, and we confidently look forward to the eternal life that He makes possible for those who follow Him like XXX did.

That is the difference between a true Christian and every one else. That the kind of man that XXX was. He received Messiah into his life. Yeshua was his living Savior. XXX has gone home.

MORE PRAYERS

Gracious God, we come before You this day in pain and sorrow. We grieve the loss of XXX, a precious human life. Give Your grace to those who grieve, that they may find comfort in Your presence, and be strengthened by Your Spirit. Draw near to this family as they mourn, and draw them together with Your healing love.

Avinu Malkaynu, thank You for Messiah who said, “I am the resurrection and the life.” Just as He wept at the grave of Lazarus, His friend, and He consoled Martha and Mary in their distress, so may He console all those who mourn today.

Avinu Malkaynu, You are mighty to save. You raise the dead. Raise from the dead and give eternal life to XXX.

Avinu Malkaynu, just as Your Son promised Paradise to the repentant thief, bring XXX to the joys of Heaven.

Avinu Malkaynu, You promised that we will joyously draw water from the springs of salvation. Thank You that XXX came to know Yeshua, who gives the Holy Spirit to all who believe, who is like Living Water that flows from our innermost being.

Avinu Malkaynu, you nourished XXX at Your table on Earth; welcome him at Your table in Heaven.

Avinu Malkaynu, thank you that Messiah is the bright morning star. We commend XXX to You, trusting in Your mercy. Guide us through our present darkness with the unfailing light of the Messiah. Let our faith be our consolation and eternal life our hope.